With everyone throwing their hat in the Apple Rumor Mill, I figured my hat needed milling, too. I’ll update after and see how I did.
I predict that on January 19, Apple will send out digital postcard invitations to an event on January 26. I know everyone is saying it’s on the 27th, but Steve Jobs has an affinity for Tuesday announcements (look it up), so why should he change it this time?
UPDATE: Nope. 100% Wrongo!
It’s the 18th, and people are getting this:
There is something bigger coming.
Looking into my crystal ball here, I see Apple releasing a touchscreen tablet with a 10.1″ glasses-free 3-D screen. The typing problem is solved by a new thumb-based split-to-the-corners virtual keyboard with a thumb-optimized layout.
Bye, Bye QWERTY!
They will pre-announce the iPhone 4.0 SDK beta that’s coming in June at WWDC10, but that won’t stop the developers from grousing.
Then world will lose it’s mind for 20 seconds as Steve Jobs says there is “one more thing…”
The jaw-dropper announcement will be
The iCar: Apple’s new flying car.
Manufactured in a plant in South Carolina, the flying car will be on the road by Christmas and showcased in Apple’s newly re-designed stores immediately. The pre-order price for the 1.0 model is $29,999
“Apple is just ripping off other people’s ideas” Paul Thurrott of Paul Thurrott’s SuperSite for Windows will say. Thurrot will be quick to point out that Apple didn’t invent flying, nor did they invent cars. “This is typical Apple Fanboyism. Apple arrives late to the market and the zealots act like they invented everything.”
ZDnet will post a retrospective of Prior Art from Fred MacMurray’s Model-T to Doc Brown’s garbage-powered DeLorean. Future Quote: “People need to be reminded that Apple didn’t invent anything they announced today – especially not the flying car.”
Slashdot will start a long list of “missing” features of the iCar, including no free tethering to the iPhone 4G and no free clones of Megan Fox in the trunk.
John Dvorak will be unavailable for comment as he will be giving CPR to Rob Enderle.
You’re predicting quotes and everything??
My hat lives dangerously.