Re-Birth of a Blog.

OK, this blog is just rusting away.

I’m writing a book on Pre-Production, so here’s where I’ll put my mental notes.

No one reads this blog anyway.

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Apple To Announce Flying Car; ZDNet & Paul Thurrott to point out Apple didn’t invent flying nor did they invent cars.

With everyone throwing their hat in the Apple Rumor Mill, I figured my hat needed milling, too. I’ll update after and see how I did.

I predict that on January 19, Apple will send out digital postcard invitations to an event on January 26. I know everyone is saying it’s on the 27th, but Steve Jobs has an affinity for Tuesday announcements (look it up), so why should he change it this time?

UPDATE: Nope. 100% Wrongo!
It’s the 18th, and people are getting this:

Source: SwitchToAMac.com

…anyway.

iSlate, iShmlate.
There is something bigger coming.

Looking into my crystal ball here, I see Apple releasing a touchscreen tablet with a 10.1″ glasses-free 3-D screen. The typing problem is solved by a new thumb-based split-to-the-corners virtual keyboard with a thumb-optimized layout.
Bye, Bye QWERTY!

They will pre-announce the iPhone 4.0 SDK beta that’s coming in June at WWDC10, but that won’t stop the developers from grousing.

Then world will lose it’s mind for 20 seconds as Steve Jobs says there is “one more thing…”

The jaw-dropper announcement will be
The iCar: Apple’s new flying car.

Manufactured in a plant in South Carolina, the flying car will be on the road by Christmas and showcased in Apple’s newly re-designed stores immediately. The pre-order price for the 1.0 model is $29,999

“Apple is just ripping off other people’s ideas” Paul Thurrott of Paul Thurrott’s SuperSite for Windows will say. Thurrot will be quick to point out that Apple didn’t invent flying, nor did they invent cars. “This is typical Apple Fanboyism. Apple arrives late to the market and the zealots act like they invented everything.”

ZDnet will post a retrospective of Prior Art from Fred MacMurray’s Model-T to Doc Brown’s garbage-powered DeLorean. Future Quote: “People need to be reminded that Apple didn’t invent anything they announced today – especially not the flying car.”

Slashdot will start a long list of “missing” features of the iCar, including no free tethering to the iPhone 4G and no free clones of Megan Fox in the trunk.

John Dvorak will be unavailable for comment as he will be giving CPR to Rob Enderle.

You’re predicting quotes and everything??

My hat lives dangerously.

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The Celebrity Name Hot Potato Game [Updated x2]

UPDATE: Take a listen to three first-time players giving it a shot by clicking here (The game itself starts roughly 9 minutes in), or scroll to the bottom for the new FAQ.

Official Rules
(Drinking Game w/ 2 bottles of wine and 3 players)

A “Celebrity” is defined as someone [Living or Dead, Fictional or Real] with a name recognizable to most people. Politicians, Sports Stars, Actors, Singers, Rappers, Poets, Cartoon Characters, and Tabloid Headliners are all fair game.

To Play:
Player 1 names a celebrity. The person to their left has 10 seconds to name a celebrity who’s FIRST name begins with the initial letter of the LAST Name of Player 1’s choice.

If they succeed, the next person in line must take the first letter of the LAST name of Player 2’s choice, etc.

Example:
Player 1: Pam Anderson
Player 2: Al Gore
Player 3: Greg Kinnear
Player 1: Kevin Spacey
Player 2: Sarah Jessica Parker
Player 3: Pauly Shore.

If a player names someone with the same initial for both first and last name (Marilyn Monroe, Ronald Reagan, Bill Bixby) then play reverses direction and the previous player has to take a drink and go again. Single-named people (Madonna, Seal, Jewel) are the same as double-initial names (Mickey Mouse, Marilyn Manson, Susan Sarandon)

Example:
Player 1: Davy Jones
Player 2: John Mellencamp
Player 3: Micky Mantle
Player 2: (takes a drink) Micky Roarke
Player 1: Richard Marx
Player 3: Maude Adams
Player 2: Amy Grant
Player 1: Gary Cooper
Player 3: Cary Grant
Player 2: George Thorogood
Player 1: Tommy Tutone
Player 2: (takes a drink) Tina Fey
Player 3: Frank Sinatra.

If you take more than 10 seconds, that’s a drink.

If you repeat a name, that’s a drink.

If you blurt out a name when it’s not your turn, that’s a drink.

No name can be used twice for the duration of the game.

If your 10 seconds are up and you “take the penalty drink”, it’s still your turn.

If you accidently use a name that’s already used, you have to take a drink and it’s still your turn.

Your turn will repeat as long as it takes for you to come up with a “correct” answer.

If you blurt out a name when it’s not your turn, that name is still up for grabs

Play ends when the 2 bottles are empty. Takes about 30-45 minutes.

Add one bottle of wine for every 2 additional players.

The non-alcoholic variation is to get a “potato” for every “drink”, and winner is the person with the fewest “potatoes” after a set time has elapsed.

The game is harder than it sounds and is much more fun with a buzzer or bell.

FAQ


Q: How long does it take to get drunk? It seems like it would take a while.
A: This game is deceptively drunktastic. It happens faster than you think it will. Within 10 minutes you will be buzzing. Don’t try to rush it. The penalty drinks keep coming faster and faster as the game progresses.

Q: I want to get drunker faster, Can I use hard liquor instead of wine?
A: You can, but the game will only last five minutes and all of the players will be vomiting in an hour.

Q: What about beer? Beer has less alcohol than wine. Can we use that?
A: You can, but beer adds three complications.
1. Beer is carbonated. (a. it speeds the absorption of alcohol – making it easier to zip right past “tipsy and witty” and zoom into “drooling and belligerent” before you know it. b. it promotes “repeats” and “underbubbles”. )
2. With beer, people tend to forget the drinking rules. (a. They just sip it the whole time. b. They start taking micro-sips when they should be taking penalty sips. )
3. Beer comes in 24, 36, and 72 packs. The end of the game is too vague. It’s about splitting a bottle, not splitting a case.

Q: I think that the person should start drinking at the beginning of their turn, and keep drinking until they come up with a name.
A: That’s not really a question. Also, it’s been tried. Just like with liquor, you’ll have vomiting players in just over an hour.

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A #FollowFriday Twist: Six Degrees of Separation

Twitter is a social medium. Like all social media, it empowers its users to influence those who follow one another.

The purist form of this influence is #FollowFriday, the weekly Twitter ritual where you share a link to someone “upstream” that you follow, so those “downstream” from you can get in on the action.

This week, I’m doing something different: Six Degrees of Separation

I’m exploring the line of influence, both up and down from my place in the line.

#6DegreesUp
This is an exploration of who on Twitter are influencing the people who are influencing me.

To find my #6DegreesUp person, I click on someone I’m following, then click on someone THEY are following, then someone THEY are following, etc. until I get to the sixth person from me. I will then follow that person, cutting the five “middlemen” out of the influence chain.

#6DegreesDown
This is an exploration of who on Twitter may be influenced by the people I may be influencing.

To find my #6DegreesDown person, I click on someone following me, then on someone following them, then someone following THEM, etc. until I get to the sixth person down. I will then follow that person and wait to see if they follow me back (cutting out the middlemen in that direction).

Staring from Me (@NeuroticNomad):
@adrianhewlett #6DegreesUp #FollowFriday
@Marielhemingway #6DegreesDown #FollowFriday.

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Oh, Lord. I’m moving AGAIN?!?

I love this apartment.

I moved in only 10 months ago, in the middle of a heat wave. It’s a third floor walkup, with a view to die for – and carrying all my stuff I felt like I was going to.

I’m moving out because, in spite of falling rent prices all over town, my landlord us going to up my rent. Oh well.

If anyone is interested, it’s the top floor of the tallest building on the top of the hill in Phinney Ridge. You can’t miss it.

Oh, and I left something on the wall.

Save Ferris

This move is an interesting one, now that I can no longer drive.

[UPDATE: I’m kinda moved. I’m in a basement at the bottom of the hill. Talk about extremes!]

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The Deniable Signs of Aging (or The Top 10 Signs You Have Become Your Parents)

There are some signs of aging you can’t deny: A creaky body, gray hair, wrinkles…

But there are signs that come before then that many people just can’t (or won’t) see. So how do you know when it has happened to you? Take my Neurotic Aging Quiz and find out.

The Top 10 Signs You Have Become Your Parents

1. “That’s Not Real Music” – This one comes in many variations. Sometimes it’s not music, it’s noise. Other times it’s not music because it was made by a formula band made by a corporation. Then there is the non-music made by non-singers who didn’t write their songs and don’t play their instruments.

This one is easy to deny because you can just tell yourself that you have better taste than those who listen to “that stuff”.

Question #1: How many of the bands you listen to have members with grown children? If it’s more than 3, give yourself a point.

2. “They Don’t Make Them Like They Used To” – This one also comes in many variations. Maybe something you “just bought” a couple of years ago broke and you lament how long the previous one lasted. Maybe you want to buy something new and it’s either different or no longer available.

This one is easy to deny because you can tell yourself that crappy build quality and stupid product changes have nothing to do with age.

Question #2: Remember metal Tonka trucks? How about Shrinky Dinks? If so, give yourself another point.

3. “That Kid In Accounting” – Referring to any adult younger than you as a “kid” when you describe them.

Question #3: Not really a question. I know you do it. One point if the person described is old enough to vote, two if they are old enough to have a college degree, three if they have teenagers at home.

4. “I Hate Touchscreens” – After age 22, change is much more difficult. I remember in the late 80s how many people resisted the computer mouse (most of them over the age of 30), but by 1995 everyone was using one. I remember in the late 70s and early 80s how resistant people over 40 were to ANYTHING computerized. (Robot Bank Tellers? Laser codes on groceries? Digital watches? NEVER!)

My advice now is the same as it was then: Ask someone closer to 15 than to 30 to explain it to you, then try to have some patience and an open mind as you actually listen to their answer rather than arguing with it.

Question #4: Have you ever waited in an extra long line at the movies rather than use their touchscreen machine to buy tickets? If you answered “Yes, because they charge extra”, give yourself two points. The second is for worrying about a cost markup equivalent to a pack of gum while paying Box Office Prices.

5. “The iPhone Sucks” – This one is easy to deny, because there are plenty of young people who hate the iPhone.

Question #5: Do you wish cell phones would go back to just making phone calls and nothing else? If so, that’s a point.

6. “Oh, Big Deal!” – When you embarrass your kids, it is SOOOO amusing. They make such a huge deal over every single thing that it’s easy to deny that they probably SHOULD be embarrassed by some of your behavior.

Question #6: Have you ever borrowed your teenager’s clothes and worn them in public? One point if you’re female, three if you’re male.

7. “They’re All The Same!” Political Stereotyping – You believe that all members of one party are bad/stupid/wrong-headed/exactly-the-same and all members of “the opposite” party are good, hardworking, caring, smart people. You consider anything other than Republican or Democrat to be “Third” Party.

This one is easy to deny, because very young people make the same error.

Question #7: Do you think all politicians (with only a few exceptions) are dirty? If yes, give yourself a point. If you think it’s worse than it used to be, give yourself another.

8. The “I’m SO OLD!” Paradox – This one we tend to observe more in our friends than ourselves.

Question #8: Have you ever complained that your friend complained about their body, and then compared your ailments to theirs? That’s another point.

9. The “I’m NOT OLD!” Denial (aka The Mid-Life Crisis). When the first of the Boomers hit this age it no longer became a verboten topic. There are hundreds of books, movies, newspaper articles, magazine stories, and stage plays that cover this topic.

#8 and #9 are two sides of the same coin. Neither one can accept that life consists of anything other than “Young” and “Old”.

Question #9: Do you think that you are “barely” middle-aged? Two points. Three if you consider yourself “Youngish” or have described yourself as “not that old”.

10. “I’m Not As Old As My Parents Were At This Age”. 30 is the new 25. 40 is the new 30. 50 is the new 40. Soon 70 will be the new 55.

Question #10: Are you mature? Two points if yes, two points if no.

Three points if you think Question #10 was referring to age instead of attitude.

OK. Time to score the test. If you read to the end and kept score, not only have you become your parents – you’re also geeky. If you sent someone this link, you have a good attitude about it.

– Nomad.

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Bad Robbery Makes For Great Security Video

Found @ The Grip

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